Aesop’s Brother

Here’s the setting.
Ken Lays company was not doing much
The stock depressed, no one buying.
Comes a heat-seeking brainwave.

Instead of making little money,
How could he drive the stock?
People want excitement,
A stock that could goes to the moon and beyond

A little cosmetic surgery might work?
Tech stocks are selling
But little Kenny wants gazillions
That called for Dick Cheney’s help

“Never mind Kenney’s Shoe Store,
No sex there”, said Dick
“We need a socko name,
That says buy or die”.

“Maybe Uranium” Dick continued
“There’s a product that oozes sex & power
OK, it’s a shoe store.
Maybe Kenny’s Uranium Shoe Store? “

“Shoes made of Uranium? Interesting.
How much could we put on a shoe?
Would people detonate?
Well, there’s always collateral damage”

“Of course, just because it says Uranium
Doesn’t mean we have to use the stuff!
If we change your first name to Uranium
There we go, Uranium Lay. Talk about sexy”

“Now, Uranium Shoes is a go,
But no, I’ve got to do something to the shoes
That great first name, then shoes?
Won’t due.”

“If we change your last name to Uranium
Why not drop your first for something
That will drive suckers to their brokers?”
And that’s how Tip Top Uranium was born.