Exoneration

Got an email today. It spoke of a jury decision that concluded I was not guilty. Not quite innocent, but not guilty. Where did that email come from? It was mailed by a good friend,. He has been in my life for forty years. This particular email was not in the nature of an inquiry, hoping to clarify a poem I had just published. It simply spoke of his shock at my “apparent” lack of concern for minorities, and gun control I exhibited in this poem..

Why didn’t he pick up the phone and “What the fuck are you doing?” No one would, or at least should ever attribute “perfection” to what I do or say. But this friend and I have discussed a great many, far more personal and potentially awkward stuff. He did not apologize for racing to send me a condemnation. And he took my explanation as exoneration.

I have lost many friends over the years. Some died, some chose. I have done my share of choosing. I want to keep this friend. I might never know why he sent that email. Maybe jealousy? Can I let it slide… I hope?.